Goth vs Gummy Bat: A Tale of Addiction
by Insane Guy of DOOM
Summary: Everyone has a weakness, for Sam, its here debilitating addiction to gummy bats. Worried for her safety, Danny and Tucker have an intervention for her. This can't end well. Comedy for all, with a heaping side order of Danny/Sam.
1. A Rude Awakening TO ADDICTION!

For a long, long, long, loooooooooong time, I've wanted to write this story. Well now I have!

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Goth vs. Gummy bat: A Story of Addiction

Danny punched Skulker in the gut so hard that he exploded! Then everyone started cheering, Vlad flew down from the sky and our favorite Halfa readied himself for battle. Instead, when Vlad landed he bowed before Danny.

"Oh great and handsome Danny! I pledge my life to thee! I shall serve you for eternity!" The older half ghost declared. Just then Sam ran up to Danny in a black bikini followed by Paulina in a pink bikini and Valerie in a yellow bikini. The Goth embraced Danny.

"Danny, Paulina, Valerie and I have been thinking. We've decided we all want to be your girlfriends!" The three girls began to hug and kiss Danny while Vlad polished his ghost form's boots. Jack and Maddie appeared and began handing him chocolate cake which the girls hand fed to him. Sam began to whisper seductively into Danny's ear. "Ooh, Danny. Danny. DANNY!" The Goth girl then slapped him.

"Huh?" Danny asked in shock.

"WAKE UP!" Sam yelled. Slowly the landscape melted away to blackness as Danny slowly awoke from his day dream.

"Ah poop."

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LINE BREAK! LINE BREAK! HORRAY FOR LINE BREAKS!

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Danny sat, slumped over his desk fast asleep. Sam and Tucker were furiously poking him, trying to wake the halfa to no avail. Sam bent down and whispered into his ear.

"Ooh, Danny. Danny. DANNY!" Getting frustrated the Goth slapped him. "WAKE UP!" Danny got up, his eyes still closed and looking around, trying to see what had hit him. Finally the halfa opened his eyes and frowned.

"Ah, Guys! I was having the best day dream of my life!" Danny threw his arms up for emphasis.

"Yeah, but school ended fifteen minutes ago." Tucker counter-argued. Still upset with his friends, Danny stood up and the trio walked out of Casper High. Once outside the building, Sam pulled out a bag full of Gummy Bats and began to shovel the small treats into her mouth.

It was handful after handful, Danny and Tucker doubted she was even chewing on them. Tucker looked towards the Goth.

"Hey Sam, can I have one? They way you eat them, they must be pretty good." Sam whipped the bag behind her back and began snarling at Tucker.

"Precious! My precious! You can't have my precious!" Danny looked rather worried after this outburst.

"Sam, I think you've had too many of those. Give the bag to me before you hurt yourself and have to get your stomach pumped like last time." The halfa pleaded.

"NEVER!" Sam screeched, she then climbed a nearby tree and sat on the tallest branch, still stuffing handful of Gummy Bats after handful of Gummy Bats into her mouth. Sam leaped from the tree and into the window of an apartment building. A lady's scream rang out from said apartment. "Sorry!" Tucker and Danny heard their friend yell. Sam climbed out of the window and muttered something that sounded like "If you're going to change, close the darn window." The Goth then jumped from the building, planning to land on her feet and make a mad dash for home. It didn't turn out that way; instead she landed on her face. Danny and Tucker cringed as the sound of girl hitting pavement filled their ears. Sam raised her index finger and told them "I'm okay." Before the arm supporting said finer collapsed.

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LINE BREAK EXTRAVAGANZA!

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The next morning, Sam awoke to find her arms and legs tied to their respective bed posts. The covers had been stripped from the bed and Danny stood over her.

"Wow Danny, I didn't know you were into this kind of thing." Sam commented while blushing. "But I'm open to try it." A look of disgust crossed the halfa's face.

"Eww! Gross Sam! No! This is an intervention for you addiction to gummy bats!"

And there you have it. In chapter two, What the Heck Ryhmes With Intervention? Sam's intevention begins and Danny has a musical flashback of the time he first realized he loved Sam. Its funny of course.


	2. Intervention

"So, you've tied me to my bed, and you're not going to let me go until I give up my so called addiction to gummy bats?" Danny nodded his head in a yes. "Well what if a ghost attacks? Or if I have to use to the bathroom?" Sam continued, trying to find a way to get Danny to untie her.

"This was one of those, 'think it up as you go along' type plans." Tucker responded. Danny simply stared into the Goth girl which he had now tied to her bed's eyes. Soon he found himself relieving the time he first realized that was more than a friend to him…

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WARNING! SUPER FLUFFY/CHEESY/HUMUROUS FLASHBACK AHEAD

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"No time!" Sam yelled before pushing the halfa behind a bush and, much to Danny's shock, began to kiss him. Valerie pulled the bush away convinced the ghost boy was hiding behind it, only to see a rather unpleasant sight. Sam stopped the kiss and looked at Valerie. "Do you mind?" She asked in a curt manner.

"Eww! Loser love!" The ghost hunter exclaimed before flying off. Now alone, Sam took this opportunity to climb off of the very startled Danny. Said halfa then got up as well and stared at his best friend in a lovesick trance. The park behind Sam melted into a collage of pink and hearts and a song began to play in Danny's head.

_I'd never though I'd fall in love_

_With a girl as super-cute as you_

_And together we'll have a lot fun_

_And we'll party until the night is done_

_I'm gonna give up everything_

_Except for candy, and cookies and ice cream too_

_Probably my ghost dog named you _(Did Danny name Cujo by that part? I can't remember)

_I'll do it all just for you_

_I love you Samantha Manson_

_I love you Samantha Manson_

_I love you Samantha Manson_

_I love you Samantha Manson_

"Danny, you didn't think that was a real kiss? Did you?" Sam asked, knocking Danny out of his fantasy world where they were married and has six kids.

"Why? Did you?" From then Danny concluded that Sam would never like him the same way and his cluelessness returned with a vengeance.

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END OF FLUFFY/CHEESY/HUMOROUS FLASBACK SEQUENSE

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Meanwhile, Sam was trying to think of anything that would convince her would-be saviors to untie her, and quickly, as the circulation to her hands and feet had been cut off.

"Sam, this is how you make us feel when you eat gummy bats." Tucker held up a picture of Paulina in her underwear as he said this. The Goth stared at him blankly. Tucker quickly stuffed the picture into his pocket. "Oops." Techno-Geek-Guy commented as he pulled out the real picture. It was a doodle of two stick figures, one with glasses, and one with a ghost tail crying as another stick figure with a ponytail poured little "things" that Sam assumed were gummy bats into her mouth.

Then something happened to Sam. She realized Danny and Tucker were right. She was addicted to gummy bats. And now she was having withdrawal…

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Sorry this chapter's so short, but it's late and I have to get my wisdom teeth taken out tomorrow. In case you were wondering the song Danny thinks of is a modified version of the song "I Love You Jaina Proudmoore" from the hilarious web series Azerothian Super Villains. Next time, Sam goes to desperate measures to get her gummy bat fix, and Joan of Arc, The Patron Saint of Self-Confessed, Angst-Ridden Goth Kids Who are in Love With Their Best Friend shows up.


	3. WTH? Joan of Arc!

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Here's chapter three. Sam gets desperate to get her gummy bat fix, while some other stuff happens. Also this will probably be the penultimate chapter.

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The pains of withdrawal filled Sam, but then she came up with an idea.

"Danny! These ropes are too tight! I have some handcuffs in my closet, don't ask why. Could you use them instead?" (**AN: **Wow, this sounds SO WRONG out of context) Sam pleaded; she didn't mention they were ghost-proof or that she was planning on using them to incapacitate Danny.

"Um, okay." The halfa shrugged and he began rummaging through Sam's closet. Finally Danny found the handcuffs and he began untying Sam's ropes.

"Okay. I can't watch walk into a trap so easily Danny. So I'm gonna go get some ice cream." Tucker commented. He then promptly left the room.

"What was that all about? What trap?" Danny asked, completely clueless. Sam shrugged and the halfa resumed untying her.

--Line Break--

Tucker walked back into the Manson Mansion, licking his chocolate ice cream cone. He looked up to the stairs.

"I guess I better check on the lovebirds." Tucker sighed and went up to Sam's room. Unsurprisingly, he saw Danny handcuffed on Sam's bed with the Goth in question hanging from the ceiling fan while emptying a bag of gummy bats into her mouth. Tucker could only face palm at this sight. Sighing once again, Tucker went over to un-cuff Danny. Once freed, Danny jumped up and pointed his finger at Sam.

"All we were trying to do was help you! And in return you tricked me and handcuffed me to your bed! Well I hope you have fun drowning yourself in gummy bats Sam!" Danny stormed out of the room and Tucker, seeing that any further negotiations would have no affect followed him.

Once the two were gone, Sam let go of the ceiling fan and landed on her bed. She then scrambled to the floor and looked underneath. _Just as I thought, _Sam thought to herself. _They were too stupid to get rid of my stash._ Beneath Sam's bed were dozens of bags of gummy bats, enough to last a normal person two months.

--A couple hours later--

Sam had eaten all of the gummy bats… She lay on her bad, fading in and out of consciousness. Colors swirled around the edge of her line of sight, and a dancing pink elephant sang karaoke on top the TV. (**AN: **What do they put in gummy bats? Drugs!?) Finally, he stomach having bloated to twice its size, and in the throes of having had a massive sugar rush, Sam passed out.

--Don't worry she's okay--

Sam opened her eyes, the room looked normal, expect for the empty bags of gummy bats scattered everywhere. And the fact she could no longer see over her stomach. The Goth sat up to find a swirling vortex in the middle of her room.

"W-where'd that come from." Sam stuttered, still half asleep/passed out. From the portal emerged a woman about eighteen. She had red hair and wore a suit of armor and had a sword.

"I am Joan of Arc. The patron saint of self confessed, cynical, angst-ridden Goth kids who are in love with their best friends!" She announced. Sam looked rather puzzled.

"What?! I thought you were the patron saint of France?" The Goth asked. A look of unimaginable anger came over Joan of Arc's face.

"Grrr! Stupid! Prejudiced! Historians!" Joan yelled. "Just because I was from France doesn't mean I'm its patron saint! But everyone I tell always says 'No-o, you're from France, so that makes you the patron saint of France!' Well I'm not! I'm the patron saint of self-confessed, cynical, angst-ridden Goth kids who are in love with their best friend. Got it?" Sam leaned back from the angered saint thing.

"So let me guess. You're some gummy bat high induced hallucination here to tell me the error of my ways?" Sam asked sarcastically.

"What? No." Joan replied. "I'm here to tell you about the Black Prophecy. Sam, unless you want everyone you love to die, you must sacrifice sixteen infants to-"From the vortex emerged a cloaked figure wielding a massive scythe. His face was shrouded, but it appeared to be nothing more than a skull. Sam immediately recognized this being to be the Grim Reaper, and were it not for the fact that she was convinced this was some hallucination, the Goth would've asked for his autograph.

"Joan of Arc!" Grim yelled in a surprisingly Jamaican accent. "You're late for your lobotomy class!" Sam looked towards the saint in confusion.

"Lobotomy class?" The Goth asked.

"All proper saints should know how to drill holes in people's heads." Joan explained. Grim grabbed her by the hand and dragged the saint back into the vortex. "We'll talk later!" Joan yelled before disappearing in the portal, which promptly shut.

"What the he-"Before Sam could finish talking, darkness clouded her vision, and for the second time that day, she passed out.

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Another chapter ends. The Joan of Arc part is based off that in the series Clone High, Joan of Arc is almost a carbon copy of Sam, and Joan once called herself a "cynical, angst ridden Goth kid" and is in love with her best friend. I hope that explains things.


End file.
